…that I am the luckiest.
1) I have an utterly fantastic wife who has loved me for over 7 years.
2) I live in a fantastic city full of everything that is wonderful.
3) I have the greatest son in the world who makes each day better than the last.
4) I spent the last 8 months off from work (paid) and get to return to my exact same job tomorrow with no punishment.
5) I have amazing friends that have supported my family in all sorts of ways from helping us get pregnant to caring for and loving our child. One of the greatest ways this is demonstrated is by my fantastic friend Sarah who is taking the week off work to take care of my son this week.
Yes, you read that correctly. She is taking vacation time to come to my house for 8 hours a day and cuddle and play with my son (although I’m sure there will be dirty diapers and crying in there as well).
While Daniela and I will generally be working opposite schedules and only will need a nanny in the afternoon this week is different because of course my first week back has to be more complicated. Daniela has to work days which leaves no one home from 8:30-4:30. When I was stressing out about this Sarah stepped in and said that not only would she help us out but that she would LOVE to help us out. Just today she sent a message saying “And then so begins the happiest week of my life and the worst of yours”. She may have been exaggerating on both sides of that but I think she will have some fun and I think I will have a lot of trouble. I also think that this will be much easier on Carter than being with his new nanny (more on that later) for such long hours rather than with someone he knows very well.
Sarah has been so good to us from the moment we met her. She LOVES babies and her wife is pregnant right now with their first who is due on my birthday! She has been an incredible friend to me through my pregnancy and early motherhood and swooned over cloth diapers and baby clothes and anything else I’m staring at online. She is a wealth of knowledge and always helps me through the rough times (she made me lactation cookies when I was struggling with producing milk). She knows everything about great baby books and helped us with Carter’s library. I don’t want to continue bragging about how good a friend I have but I do want to just say how lucky we are to have someone who will make this week as easy on us as possible.
There are a lot of things I will miss when I return to work this week now that my maternity leave has concluded. I will miss the snuggles, and the walks with Carter in the Ergo for hours each day. I’ll miss swimming pool trips and the drop-in play centre. I’ll miss feeding him dinner when Daniela comes home to watch his face light up with pure love. I’ll miss having so much time watching him learn new things and make new noises. I’ll miss watching his little fluffy butt wiggle around on the floor. I’ll even miss some of his little mini-meltdowns when he reaches out to me with so much eagerness. The greatest thing, however, that I will miss, is the many days of Carter and Violet.
Carter and Violet met when they were still in their belly homes in my Pre-natal Class. They met in the flesh when Carter was around 7 weeks old and Violet was just shy of 2 weeks old.
They had a bit of a long distance relationship going while Carter set off to travel the world (visit family in the states) and then they have spent day after day together since. He’s been blessed with the comfort of familiarity and a friend to grow and learn with and I’ve been blessed with the friendship of her mother, Brandi. (I’ve also been grateful to have time with a lovely little girl baby who wears the cutest dresses!) Together we have done baby yoga, carrier-fit, stroller-fit, swim lessons, baby massage, parks, drop-ins and countless hours of just sitting around.
I don’t know how I would’ve gotten through some of the days without Brandi and Violet. It’s been amazing to watch them go from being two babies placed next to each other to two little ones reaching out for one another, sharing toys and babbling on.
I don’t know how anyone does it without another mom around. I never even thought I would need someone to spend time with aside from my son but it absolutely never occurred to me that my son would need someone to spend time with aside from me. On Carter’s worst days Violet is almost always a break from the tears.
I’m sure that Carter would have a close relationship with any baby he spent so much time with but I want to believe that his relationship with Violet is a little different.
I know their relationship isn’t over just because I’m going back to work. I know she still lives just down the street and I know there is a chance they will have the opportunity to grow up together but I’m still sad that seeing each other on a daily basis is over for a while. I’m sad that I won’t get to see my friend every day either. We’ve gotten to navigate this whole motherhood thing together. I’ve had someone to whine to and someone to celebrate with. I don’t think I ever could have imagined the value of the friendship between two new moms.
It’s pretty sad that I don’t have a single picture of Brandi and I together.